


Setting, Rising, Shining

by SlantedKnitting



Series: Spectrum [3]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - America, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Modern Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-08 03:34:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17973695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlantedKnitting/pseuds/SlantedKnitting
Summary: Merlin and Arthur, still together after Gwaine's party, deal with their first college semesters away from each other.And then their 10-year high school reunion.





	1. Setting

**Author's Note:**

> Continuation (and end) of this verse. Enjoy!

"We can get some of my dad's wine when we get back to my house," Arthur said as he opened the car door for Merlin. "Sorry I lost my fake ID."

"You know I don't care." Merlin slid into the passenger's seat and closed the door, waiting for Arthur to sit in the driver's seat. "I am capable of having a meal without alcohol."

Arthur chuckled as he turned on the car. "Noted. The wine offer still stands."

"Is there still more of that one we had the other night?"

"Probably." Arthur turned to check the parking lot behind them and then pulled out and started heading back to his house. He turned on the radio and didn't protest when Merlin sang along—loudly—to every song that came on during their ride.

"We should go back to that karaoke place after you get back from your uncle's," Merlin suggested when they finally pulled into Arthur's driveway.

"I don't think they'll let us back in," Arthur teased. "Not after how badly you butchered 'Bat Out of Hell' last time."

"Is it my fault Meatloaf is impossible to live up to?"

"It certainly is."

Merlin snorted and leaned across the car to give Arthur a peck before getting out of the car. Arthur took his hand once they reached the door and led him upstairs. When they were safe inside Arthur's room, they kicked off their shoes and sat down on the edge of Arthur's bed.

"Do you want that wine?" Arthur asked, putting his hand on Merlin's knee.

"Maybe later." Merlin covered one of Arthur's feet with his own, and Arthur laughed.

"What are you doing?"

"Hm?" Merlin asked, playing innocent.

Arthur rolled his eyes and covered Merlin's foot with his free one, leaving Merlin to complete the pile with his other foot.

"Well," Arthur said, staring down at their feet. "That's that, then."

"Indeed."

Arthur smirked and shifted up a little, freeing his feet and swinging one of his legs over Merlin's until he was in Merlin's lap.

"What do you want to do?" he asked, tracing Merlin's jaw with a fingertip.

Merlin sighed as Arthur's touch made him shiver. He could easily say that he wanted to watch a movie or play a video game or something—they'd eaten early and still had most of the night ahead of them. But now that Arthur was in his lap, there was really only one answer to the question. Even after more than a year, Arthur could still get him raring to go more easily than was probably dignified.

"You want to fuck me?" he asked before turning his head to nip at Arthur's palm.

"Yeah," Arthur breathed. He pulled his hand away and ran it over Merlin's hair before sinking down into a kiss.

Merlin quickly wrapped his arms around Arthur's back and lay down, pulling Arthur on top of him.

Arthur started rocking his hips against Merlin's, and Merlin sighed into their kiss and did his best to push up against Arthur's rhythm. He was already getting hard, already getting that ache to have Arthur inside him, already feeling a desperate edge overtaking him.

"Hey!" There was a knock on the door and Arthur jolted in surprise.

"I know you're in there!" Morgana, Arthur's sister, shouted through the door.

Arthur sighed and gave Merlin a quick kiss before getting up and opening the door.

"What?" he demanded.

Morgana let herself inside, and Merlin sat up. She glanced over at him but didn't seem to care that she had interrupted them.

"What the hell did you do to my make-up?"

Merlin did his best not to react. He and Arthur had snuck into Morgana's room the night before, slightly tipsy, and attempted to do each other up to see if either of them should pursue a life of drag.

The answer had been a resounding 'no,' at least not without the help of a proper make-up artist.

Merlin had thought they'd put everything back as they'd found it, but maybe they'd been a little too drunk by then to really notice what they were doing.

"We didn't—"

"Do you know how gross it is to share eye make-up with someone? You're buying me new stuff."

"Morgana—"

"All of it. Immediately."

"Not _immediately_ ," Arthur protested. "I'm busy."

"You can fuck some other time. You're taking me out _now_. I have plans tonight."

Arthur sighed and looked over at Merlin, who shrugged. He kind of felt it was fair to replace what they'd used of Morgana's. He'd offer to pitch in, but he knew Arthur would dismiss him. Arthur knew he couldn't afford to throw money at his problems. Besides, the whole drag thing had been Arthur's ideas in the first place.

"Fine," Arthur said. "Do you want to come?" he asked Merlin.

Merlin quirked an eyebrow but didn't succumb to the obvious joke. "I don't know. Should I?"

"I'll help you pick out your own make-up," Morgana said, smiling a little wickedly. "If you really want it so desperately."

"Yes," Merlin said emphatically, thinking that teaming up with Morgana sounded like an excellent way to annoy Arthur. Arthur always fucked so roughly whenever Merlin riled him up, and Merlin wanted it good and hard.

Arthur rolled his eyes and slipped his shoes back on. "You two will be the death of me."

"Well, that's what you get for _stealing_."

"It was borrowing."

"You can't _borrow_ make-up," Morgana said, exasperated. "That's disgusting."

"Lesson learned," Arthur muttered. He held out his hand, and Merlin took it so Arthur would pull him off the bed. "You sure you want to subject yourself to this?"

"Maybe she can help us find the right shade of lipstick."

"Good God," Morgana muttered as she opened the door to head downstairs.

Arthur chuckled and tugged Merlin in for a kiss. "Will you wear it when I fuck you later?"

"Absolutely."

Arthur grinned and reached around to give Merlin's ass a squeeze before he turned and followed his sister back out to his car.

 

\----------

 

The next week, Merlin practically fell out of his car in his rush to get into Arthur's house as quickly as possible. Arthur had finally gotten back from his family's trip to see their uncle, and Merlin hadn't seen him in _four days_ , which was the longest they'd gone without seeing each other all summer. And pretty soon it would be weeks, maybe even months between when they could see each other, and Merlin wanted to get in as much time as possible before they had to go back to that.

Merlin knocked when he reached the door, trusting that Arthur was on the other side waiting for him. Sure enough, it was barely a full second before Arthur opened the door and Merlin stepped inside.

"Missed you," Merlin said, pulling on Arthur's shirt until he stepped forward so Merlin could kiss him. "How was your trip?"

"The usual," Arthur said quietly. He ducked his head to place a kiss on Merlin's neck, and then he pressed his face there and took a deep breath.

"Hey," Merlin said, wrapping his arms around Arthur's waist. "You okay?"

Arthur stayed where he was for another long moment before stepping away. "Come out back?"

Merlin nodded and followed Arthur through his house and out the back door, onto the patio.

"Something wrong?" Merlin asked as Arthur sat down in one of the wicker chairs.

Arthur motioned for Merlin to sit as well, so he did. They sat next to each other in silence for a minute. Merlin did his best not to panic, but all he could think about was that time in high school when he'd come over to tell Arthur he didn't want to sleep together anymore. Even though he wasn't doing or saying anything of the sort now, he had the same dreadful feeling in his stomach.

"Arthur?" he asked when he couldn't stand it anymore. "Can you just tell me what the problem is so we can talk it out and fix it?"

Arthur sighed and angled his chair a little so that he could face Merlin more easily, but then he kept his gaze on the trees lining the far edge of his backyard. He looked like he hadn't slept the night before—he was pale and there were bags under his eyes and he was slumped in the chair, seemingly exhausted.

"I can't leave and…" There was another hard silence. "And go through another year of this," he finished.

Well, that certainly cleared that up.

"Another year of what?" Merlin asked, frustrated that Arthur wouldn't just _look_ at him.

"Of not seeing you," Arthur said, and Merlin's stomach clenched. "This summer has been…" Arthur rubbed his eyes and finally looked at Merlin. "I can't go back to college for sophomore year the same way I did for freshman year. It's too fucking hard not being able to see you. And we can't visit nearly as much as I… as I _need_ us to, and when we do it's—" Arthur shook his head and looked away again. "It's awful. A weekend is never enough, and then it's weeks or _months_ of just nothing at all, and I can't do it anymore."

Merlin realized he was gripping the wicker armrest so hard that it was splintering under his fingernails, and he tried to relax his hands. He couldn't believe this was happening, he couldn't believe Arthur was trying to walk away from this, he couldn't believe—

"What the fuck have we been doing all summer, then? Have you just been planning this the whole time?"

"No," Arthur said, his voice barely more than a whisper. "I was going to do it when we got home, but…" He coughed and when he spoke again, he sounded wrecked. "But then I saw you, and I couldn't do it. I couldn't lose this, I couldn't lose _you_. I thought it would be fine," he said, turning to Merlin with an imploring look. "I thought I would be able to figure it out and go back to school with everything being normal and happy. But the closer it comes to that, the fucking sicker I feel. Like, physically sick. I love you _so_ much, and this summer has been—it's been incredible, spending _every_ day with you, and I can't go back to having less. I _can't_ do it, Merlin. Ten hours is just too much, it's too far, it's too hard, it's not—"

Arthur looked down, halting his speech abruptly.

"Not worth it?" Merlin guessed. He wasn't surprised to hear the bite in his tone.

Arthur shook his head. "No. It's not something I can do for three more years. And then what, you know? What happens after we graduate? We can't guarantee we'll be able to be in the same place, and I just…" He took a long, shuddering breath and looked back up. His eyes were red and wet, and Merlin wanted to punch him. "I tried really, really hard. But this long distance thing is just never going to be enough for me."

"You didn't try," Merlin said. He felt hot all over, like he might catch fire at any moment. He hoped he did. He hoped he destroyed all of Arthur's dad’s stupid lawn furniture. "If you really wanted to try, right now wouldn't be the first I'm hearing about this. You could have fucking talked to me about this and we could have figured out something else, something better. If you were struggling and hiding it, then you weren't trying anything."

"What 'something else' could we have done?" Arthur asked angrily. "We saw each other as much as we possibly could have, and it wasn't enough. I can't do it again. It's exhausting trying to pick myself back up after we see each other. I tried so hard to be, you know, just—just open and, and present with you, but it hurt so fucking much when you weren't there that I had to shut that off completely between our shitty visits, and I don't have it in me to go through that again."

Merlin felt a muscle twitching in his jaw and he clenched, willing himself not to cry. Let Arthur cry. Arthur was the one ruining this.

"Say something," Arthur pleaded after Merlin let the silence drag on for too long.

"I don't know what to say, Arthur."

Arthur sniffled, and finally Merlin was the one to look away.

"You should have just done it at the beginning of summer."

"I know," Arthur whispered. "I really thought that I would be able to get over this, but… it was stupid. I knew. I knew it couldn't last, but I was—I was being selfish."

"Yes." Merlin stood up, too close to losing it and not willing to let Arthur see that. "I'm sorry I made you so—" He stopped himself from lashing out. "I'm sorry."

The walk back through Arthur's house was a blur, and then Merlin was in his car with the engine on and his hands clutching the steering wheel and no air in his lungs.

"Fuck," he gasped, and it all came out.

Merlin pressed his forehead to the wheel and let himself break down.

Arthur was an asshole. He'd strung Merlin along for so long, _used_ Merlin, and then blamed his shit decisions on the distance. He'd kept this crucial part of himself so fucking guarded that—

Merlin covered his face with his hands and tried to catch his breath.

No, Arthur had tried. The distance wasn't easy on either of them. Merlin certainly didn't enjoy driving away after two too-short days on Arthur's campus. He enjoyed watching Arthur driving away from his campus even less. He didn't enjoy any of that, but he coped with it because everything else was so good. The hot and heavy visits, the online games, the silly phone calls, the naked video chats. It was everything Merlin could ask for, and if the concession he had to make was that Arthur went to school ten hours away, well. He was okay with that.

But Arthur wasn't, and Merlin couldn't fault him for that.

They had never promised each other anything. They had simply said they'd try to stay together despite the distance, and that was the last they'd talked about it.

Because they hadn't wanted to talk about it.

They should have. Arthur should have said something earlier.

But he'd kept it inside instead, and when it finally got to be too much, he'd walked away. Walked away from Merlin. Walked away from more than a year and a half of something that had changed both of their lives for the better.

Because, even though it hurt when they were so far apart, most of the time, Merlin was _so_ happy. He was in love. He had a wonderful, incredible boyfriend. A boyfriend who sent him at least two inane selfies every damn day—even when they were together—which never failed to make Merlin smile. Merlin had even bought an extra memory card for his phone so he could save all of them, even the out of focus ones and the ones Arthur took at night with such bad lighting that Merlin could barely even see him at all. But he loved knowing Arthur was thinking of him, so he saved every single photo. He kept the best ones in their own folder: the one of Arthur petting an albino skunk, the one of Arthur shoving an entire slice of pizza into his mouth, the one of Arthur fresh out of the shower with the most gloriously carefree smile, the one of Arthur wearing his 'I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is' shirt on his first day of freshman orientation. Merlin had used that one as his background picture for months.

He couldn't imagine deleting any of those photos off his phone.

Fuck, this hurt so much.

Another car drove by and Merlin realized he was sobbing in front of Arthur's house. The thought that Arthur—or his sister, or his father—might see him sobered him enough that he drove his car around the corner and parked in front of someone else's house.

He sat for a while longer, thinking of nothing and slowly letting his breath even out.

Christ, his head was throbbing. He hated crying. And he didn't want to be here anymore.

Taking one last big breath, Merlin started off on the road again and went home.

 

\----------

 

Five days later, Merlin was packed and loading up his car for another semester. His mom was inside the house baking a batch of cookies for Merlin to take on the road.

He was so ready to go back to school and throw himself into his classes. He needed a distraction—any distraction. He'd spent the past few days with nothing to do but sit in his room with Gwen, and sometimes Lance, and feel sad for himself. He was ready for a change.

As Merlin was shoving a trash bag full of his bedding into the backseat, his phone buzzed in his pocket. It was probably Gwen trying to come see him and say goodbye—for the third time—before they headed off for another year apart.

**Hi. Gwen told me you were leaving today (I though I had another day to do this). If you have time, could you come meet me at the playground by the high school? I don't want us to leave things on a bad note**

Merlin slumped into the passengers seat, pushing a tangle of chargers and USB cables onto the floor.

He just wanted to get up to college, move into his new dorm, catch up with his friends, and settle back into that life. He didn't want to deal with Arthur or confront his feelings or cry anymore. He wanted to move on and never, ever, _ever_ look back.

But maybe that wasn't healthy. And maybe it would be nice to say a proper goodbye. Whatever that might look like.

_**I can be there in 20** _

Merlin locked up his car and went inside to change his shirt since he'd sweat through the one he was wearing from lugging so much shit between the house and his car. He had time to take a shower—he could drive to the park in about 5 minutes—but decided against it. He had nothing to shower for.

"How's it coming along?" his mom asked when he came down from his room.

"All done. Um. I'm running out for a bit, but it shouldn't be too long."

"Are you seeing Gwen? Do you want to bring her some cookies?"

"No, thanks," Merlin said, forcing a smile. "I'm… Arthur wanted to meet, so…"

His mom frowned. "Are you sure you want to? You're allowed to say 'no' to him."

"I know, Mom. It's fine. I want to."

"Well." Apparently unable to think of anything else to say, she pulled him into a hug.

"Thanks," Merlin said into her hair. He stepped back and turned away quickly, needing to get to the park and get this over with as soon as possible.

Even though he took the long way, the drive still felt like it only took a minute, and then Merlin was walking toward where Arthur was sitting on a bench near the swingsets.

He looked—well, he looked tired. But good. Tempting. Comforting. Familiar.

Merlin sat down next to him, making sure to leave enough room between them that their knees wouldn't knock together, and watched the kids on the swings.

"I hope I'm not throwing off your schedule."

Merlin shook his head.

"I, uh… I thought I remembered you saying you were leaving on Sunday, but I saw Gwen and Lance yesterday and they said—"

"I changed my mind," Merlin said. The dorm was open for him already. He had just originally planned to stay home as long as possible. To be with Arthur.

"Oh."

Merlin sighed and leaned back a little as he shoved his hands in his jeans pockets. This wasn't making him feel any better. This was making him feel worse.

"I wanted to say that I'm sorry," Arthur said, his voice pitched low. "I realized that I didn't say that the other day. But I am. I didn't want to hurt you, and I didn't want to end this, but… I had to. But I'm still sorry. I wish things were different."

Merlin shrugged. Wishing would get them nowhere.

"Are you okay?" Arthur asked. "You're not usually this quiet."

"I don't have anything to say," Merlin snapped.

He didn't know why he was being like this. He didn't want to ruin everything they'd had by being a dick on his way out the door, but anything else seemed unthinkable. What other option was there? A kiss? A hug? A _handshake?_ Calmly walking away again like it wasn't ripping him freshly apart?

Arthur fell quiet and Merlin closed his eyes. He couldn't do this. He couldn't pretend that he didn't feel incredibly broken inside. He couldn't act like Arthur hadn't meant _everything_ to him.

"Do you think," Arthur started, and Merlin looked back up at the swings, "that maybe we could stay friends?"

"We were never friends, Arthur," Merlin said. It came out harsher than he meant it to, but it was still true. They'd gone from strangers to fuck buddies in about 10 minutes, and from fuck buddies to boyfriends three months later. They had never been just friends.

"Didn't we _become_ friends?"

Arthur sounded so small and unsure, and Merlin didn't ever want to hear that again.

"Yes," he admitted, and that small acknowledgement was enough to make his eyes sting. "But I—" His voice broke and he swallowed. "I don't think I can be friends. I don't see how that would be any less hard. I can't just talk to you and pretend that everything is fine and that I'm—"

Out of the corner of his eye, Merlin could see Arthur turning toward him, so he turned his head the other way, focusing on the see-saws. "Can't pretend that I don't love you," he finished. His voice was ragged and raw, and he didn't want to give Arthur any more of himself. He couldn't. It hurt too much.

Merlin sniffled and wiped his eyes before forcing himself to turn and look at Arthur.

Arthur looked miserable.

"I'm sorry," Merlin managed. "I can't. If this is what's happening then I need a clean break."

Arthur nodded. "You don't have to be sorry."

They held each other's gaze for a moment, but then Merlin looked back at the swings. He couldn't be here anymore. He couldn't do this.

He wiped his eyes again, ready to go.

"I hope you… have a good semester," Arthur said.

It was a pathetic excuse of a farewell, but Merlin didn't care. It didn't matter.

"Goodbye, Arthur."

He stood and walked to his car without looking back. When he was settled in the driver's seat and about to pull out of his parking spot, Merlin allowed himself to glance over at the bench.

Arthur was gone.

Merlin drove home.


	2. Rising, Shining

Merlin didn't know how Gwen still managed to talk him into these things. He really should have known better by now, but somehow she always managed to say just the right thing at just the right time to make him second-guess himself, and then he ended up somewhere he hadn't wanted to be. It had happened before, and it would happen again, and, most importantly, it was happening right now. At their 10-year high school reunion.

Merlin hadn't even liked high school that much. It had just been, well… high school. He'd been the only out gay boy, he'd had a total of one close friend, he'd been barely average academically, he hadn't been involved in any activities—none of it had ever been anything to write home about.

Except that whole Arthur romance thing senior year, but that had been a fluke.

College had been much better. He'd found friends, hobbies, classes he excelled at, boys, boys, and more boys, and he'd found… himself?

The open bar at the reunion had clearly been a mistake if Merlin was already waxing poetic about his college days, and it was barely eight o'clock.

Leaving his still half-full beer on an empty table, Merlin went to go track down Gwen. She'd walked away at some point, promising to be _right_ back, but Merlin was pretty sure that at least fifteen minutes had passed. Lance wasn't anywhere in sight either, although Merlin could make an easy guess as to where he was, since the football team had staked claim of the pool tables on the second floor of the bar.

Merlin wandered through the crowd, making vague small talk with people he barely remembered and keeping an eye out for Gwen's curly mop.

He found Gwaine first.

"'Ey, Merlin!" Gwaine shouted, slinging an arm around Merlin's neck. "Lookin' good!"

Merlin patted Gwaine on the back before extracting himself. "Thanks. You, too. I like the haircut."

Gwaine scoffed and ran a hand through his short locks. "I hate it. I lost a bet."

"It looks nice."

"Yeah? Well, I'll take your word for it. How've you been?"

Merlin shrugged. He'd run into Gwaine a handful of times since high school, and Gwaine never failed to act like Merlin was a long lost best friend. It was kind of endearing.

"Good. You still at that law firm?"

"Yeah. Working for the man, you know how it goes. Have you been upstairs?"

Merlin shook his head.

"No? Come on, come up. Lance and Gwen are up there with everyone, come say hi. We'll have an old lunch table reunion."

"I'm good," Merlin said, plastering on a smile. "Really. I was just going to get another drink."

Gwaine shrugged. "Suit yourself. Come find me before you go."

"Why?"

"So I can kiss you goodbye!" Gwaine winked and headed for the stairs.

Merlin turned toward the bar and considered his options. He could get yet another drink and wait for Gwen to remember about him. He could quit while he was ahead and walk back to his mom's house. Or he could get well and truly smashed, brave the upstairs, and trust Gwen to get him a ride home.

He didn't like any of those options, but it was too early to go back home and spend the night watching TV with his mom, so he got in line to get another drink.

"Hey."

Merlin ignored the voice at first, assuming it had been directed at someone else.

"Hey. Merlin."

Merlin looked around and came face to face with the guy who had been the most popular of their high school's theater kids. Merlin had been _obsessed_ with him before the whole Arthur thing. He'd been gorgeous back then. He was gorgeous now.

"Hey," Merlin said. "Long time no see."

The guy—Merlin realized he couldn't actually remember his name—laughed even though the joke was incredibly played out on a night like tonight.

"What are you having?" he asked as they approached the bar.

Merlin gave his order and the theater boy signaled for the bartender to get two.

"You look great," the guy said appreciatively, and Merlin bit down a smile. His high school self would have lost his entire shit if the theater boy had hit on him back then. "Some of these guys have really let themselves go."

"Mhm," Merlin agreed, watching the bartender.

"Where do you live these days?"

"The city," Merlin said, taking his beer and leading the way over to the nearest empty corner. "You?"

"Yeah, same."

The theater boy took a sip of his drink, and Merlin did the same, trying not to let the awkward silence get to him.

"You know," the guy said, "this is going to sound really cheesy, but I always admired you, back in school."

"You did?" Merlin asked skeptically. "Why? I didn't even know you knew who I was."

"We were in the same English class all 4 years," the guy pointed out.

"I mean, besides that part."

The theater boy smiled softly, and Merlin hurried to take another drink.

"I admired the fact that you were willing to come out back then. I thought you were fucking nuts at the time, but once I came out in college, it was like, Jesus, why didn't I do this sooner, you know?"

Merlin nodded. "Yeah, it's a weight off."

"Yeah. Well," the guy knocked his glass against Merlin's. "Cheers to queers."

Merlin chuckled and took a long swig of his drink. He stayed in the corner talking to the theater boy for a good hour—still trying to remember his name and thinking about resorting to texting Gwen to see if she remembered—until the football team was kicked off the second floor to make room for non-reunion patrons. They came down to the first floor, and suddenly everything was a lot louder and more crowded.

"Another drink?" the guy asked, leaning closer to Merlin to be heard over the ruckus.

"Sure!"

Merlin watched him walk away and then looked around for Gwen, _needing_ to know his name if they were going to hook up.

He couldn't see Gwen anywhere. She was far too short to be found in a crowd, especially one of full of jocks the size of Percy and Leon.

Leon met Merlin's gaze and gave a wave before turning away to say something to someone Merlin couldn't see. And before Merlin could convince himself that that didn't mean what he thought it meant, Arthur was heading straight for him.

Merlin downed the last of his drink and set the glass down gently, taking care to line it up with the grain on the wooden windowsill.

"Hey," Arthur shouted as he approached.

Merlin swallowed and looked up in time to see Arthur reach him.

"Hey."

Fuck. He had thought he was prepared for this moment. He had known this moment was coming. He had prepared himself for it. For being calm, cool, collected, casual, confident. For being unaffected. For being _normal_.

All of that flew out the window as soon as they locked eyes, though. Arthur was as beautiful as ever. He was wearing a blue shirt that brought out his eyes, and his cheekbones were like fucking daggers in the shitty bar lighting, and his lips were as wide and pouty and perfect as Merlin remembered. He looked good.

He looked amazing.

Merlin knew he wasn't bad, either. He'd filled out and figured out his hair and mostly grown into his ears. But, _Christ_ , Arthur was beautiful.

Or maybe Merlin was just tipsy.

Or both.

"How are you?" Arthur asked, moving closer.

"I'm good," Merlin said loudly. "I'm waiting for—"

"Do you want to—" Arthur said at the same time. He laughed awkwardly and gave Merlin a long look. "Do you want to go outside?" he asked. "It's quieter."

Mostly Merlin wanted to say put and wait for the theater boy to come back with another drink. But he didn't want to be rude, and he had known he'd have to talk to Arthur at some point this evening, and it might as well be now. So he nodded and followed Arthur out onto the sidewalk.

"Got fucking loud in there," Arthur said, handing over one of two beers he was holding.

"Did you… get this for me?"

"It was for Gwaine, actually."

"Well, in that case." Merlin took a sip.

Arthur grinned. "How are you? How have you been?"

"Good."

"Nine years and all you can say is 'good'?"

"How am I supposed to sum up nine years in a few words?"

Arthur shrugged. "I don't know. Reunions are weird."

Merlin nodded and a long pause drifted between them.

"Seriously," Arthur finally said. "How are you? What are you up to these days?"

"I live in the city," Merlin said, resorting to the same spiel he'd been giving all night. "Avalon Publishing. You?"

"I'm at Camelot Industries. We're actually opening an office down here next month. I'm, um… moving down to manage some of the developers."

Merlin took another drink of his beer. Arthur had gone to school ten hours west of their hometown and, as far as Merlin knew from the occasional unsolicited update from Gwen or Lance, had been living about five hours north since graduating. Now suddenly he was moving back. Into the city. Merlin's city.

"Sounds fancy," Merlin said lamely. "Congrats, I guess."

"Yeah, it… was a promotion," Arthur said quietly. "Listen, um… I just. I'm really sorry about the way things ended between us," he said, speaking low and quick like he was forcing himself to get through it. "It was shitty of me to go that whole summer pretending like everything was okay. And I really didn't want to lose you as a friend. I just…"

"It's fine," Merlin heard himself saying. "It was along time ago."

"I know, I just… wanted to apologize."

"Well. Thanks, I guess. Or, I don’t know. No apology necessary. These things happen, you know? We were young, it was bound to end at some point."

Arthur nodded and took a long swig of beer. "So… I heard you studied abroad in England," he said eventually.

"Who'd you hear that from?" Merlin asked.

"Lance. Who else?"

"Right. Why'd he bring that up?"

"I don't know. Gwen was probably missing you."

"What, earlier tonight?"

"No, when it happened. Like… years ago. Sorry, I was just trying to make conversation." Arthur huffed and looked like he was about to head back inside, so Merlin grabbed his arm.

"Sorry, sorry," he said, keeping Arthur put. "This isn't my first beer of the night, and I was… I was really nervous to talk to you."

Arthur looked down at where Merlin was still holing his arm, and Merlin dropped his hand quickly. "It's all right," he said. "I was nervous, too." He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. "So… how was it?"

"What?"

"Studying abroad."

"Oh." Merlin licked his lips. "It was fun. I'd love to go back at some point. Have you travelled much?"

"Went to Paris last year, mostly just because I could. I'd always wanted to go."

"I remember," Merlin said slowly. "What was that other thing on your bucket list? Something about… getting a cat to love you?"

Arthur snorted. "I'm sure that wasn't it."

"No, it definitely was. You wanted to go to Paris, get a tattoo, and win the affections of a cat."

"A stray cat," Arthur muttered.

Merlin laughed. "Right. A stray cat. How's that one going?"

"Still on the list, I guess. There's still time."

Merlin took a sip of his beer and then asked, "So you got a tattoo?"

Arthur said nothing, looking smug. Merlin found himself wanting to know about it, about where it was, what it meant, how it looked on Arthur's body. He finished off his beer with a long gulp.

"Do you want another one?" Arthur asked.

"Probably shouldn't," Merlin admitted. "I've had… I've lost count."

"I can get you a water," Arthur offered. "I should stop as well."

"Yeah," Merlin heard himself say. "Thanks."

Arthur went back inside and Merlin pinched himself. Talking with Arthur was… was normal. Exceedingly normal. Like no time had passed at all.

Except for the electric current running beneath Merlin's skin every time their eyes met, every time Arthur smiled and showed off his still-crooked teeth, every time Merlin caught glimpse of Arthur's collar bones peeking out of the v-neck shirt he was wearing. He had always favored a good v-neck shirt. Probably because he knew how damned good he looked in them.

Merlin pinched himself again, trying not to think about all the times he'd pulled Arthur's v-neck wider to nip at his collar bones or leave a hickey just out of sight.

"Here you go," Arthur said when he came back outside, handing over a bottle of water.

"Thanks." Merlin took a few sips, pretending not to notice the way Arthur was watching him. "So," he tried. "What do you do at Camelot?"

"Senior developer. Right now my team's building a new security application."

"Like… home security?" Merlin guessed lamely.

"Cyber security. You know, like, the cloud, encryption, whatnot. What about you?"

"I'm editing. Fantasy, mostly. Did you read _The Castle of Fyrien_? It came out last year."

"No, but… Morgana bought me a copy, oddly enough. Haven't gotten around to it. You worked on it?"

Merlin nodded, trying to imagine Arthur having a to-read pile in his apartment. He wondered where Arthur lived and what it was like. Maybe tidy, like his father's house. Or probably messy, like his room had always been. Messy and lived in and welcoming.

Merlin cleared his throat. "Yeah. I'm working with the writer on the sequel now."

"I'll have to make sure I read it. That's pretty impressive."

Merlin shrugged. "Yeah. They like me a lot, so…"

Arthur looked back at the bar for a moment. "Do you want to get some food or something? This water's not going to be enough to sober me up."

"Do you have to drive?"

"Just back to my dad's, yeah."

"We can get food. You're not driving, though. You can crash at my mom's with me."

"That's—"

"Shut up. You don't get a vote if you're drunk enough to consider driving."

"I'm not that drunk, I was trying to get sober," Arthur protested.

"Nope. Her couch is plenty comfortable, I promise. It's kept me good company on many a night."

Arthur snorted. "Why are you sleeping on your mom's couch so much?"

"She turned my room into her art studio."

"Where are you going to sleep, then?"

"She's got an air mattress somewhere. Come on, let's go find food."

"You're still a weirdo," Arthur said fondly, slinging an arm around Merlin's neck as they headed down the sidewalk. "I've missed that."

Merlin wrapped his arm around Arthur's back, trying not to think too hard about it.

"And you're still a lightweight."

"That was you," Arthur pointed out. "Remember winter break freshman year when you did shots with Gwaine?"

"I try not to."

Arthur laughed and extracted his arm, and Merlin did the same.

"That was a ridiculous party. I'd die if I drank that much now."

"You're making me feel old."

"You are old."

"You're older. By like, almost a full year."

"Shh," Arthur hushed him dramatically. "Don't remind me."

Merlin laughed and steered Arthur in the direction of another bar that looked like it would be less crowded.

"Here good?" he asked. "We can probably get burgers."

"Ooh, nachos," Arthur said, looking at the menu posted in the window. "My treat."

"If you insist," Merlin said, following Arthur inside.

 

\----------

 

Merlin woke up to the sound of his mother setting down two mugs on the coffee table next to his head.

"Good morning," she whispered. "I brought you coffee. I have to run out. Will you be okay?"

Merlin managed to grunt in response. Hunith just chuckled and kissed him on the forehead. A minute later, he heard the front door close.

Heaving a sigh, Merlin forced himself to sit up. He was on the air mattress in the middle of the living room, and it looked like it was already late into the morning. Arthur was on the couch on the other side of the coffee table, still asleep. He was curled up on his side, facing the back of the couch and snoring quietly.

Merlin rubbed his eyes and reached for the coffee Hunith had brought. He had no idea how late it had been when they finally got home the night before. They'd stayed out at the second bar until closing, and then they'd sat in the park for who knows how long until it got to be too cold and they finally walked back to Merlin's house.

It had been fun. It had been really fun.

They'd been really drunk.

Merlin didn't know what it was going to be like now that they were sober and facing daylight.

He took a sip of coffee and sighed, wondering if he should wake up Arthur.

"What's that?" Arthur muttered.

Merlin frowned, hoping he hadn't started thinking out loud.

Arthur grunted and rolled over. He looked bleary and tired and still as beautiful as he had the night before.

"Aw, fuck," he groaned. "I was hoping that was it."

"What?"

"Coffee." With a noise like a walrus, Arthur sat up and reached for the other mug. "Did you make this?"

"My mom did."

"Bless her." Arthur blew into his coffee before taking a sip. "Fuck."

Merlin chuckled. "Yeah. If you give me a few minutes I can try to figure out food."

"Food," Arthur said vaguely, closing his eyes. "Yeah."

"Yeah," Merlin said, trying not to smile at how ridiculous Arthur was when he was still half-asleep. "Food."

"Mmm."

"Mhm."

"Hmm."

They continued making vague noises at each other as they drank their coffee, getting sillier and sillier with it until Arthur started making dolphin noises.

"And you claim _I'm_ the weirdo," Merlin teased.

"You most definitely are," Arthur said with certainty. He set down his mug with a sigh and ran his hands over his face. "Thanks for letting me crash here last night. I definitely shouldn't have been attempting to drive."

"I know. It's no problem. How was the couch?"

"A perfect gentleman."

Merlin snorted and rolled off the air mattress, gracelessly getting to his feet. "Food?"

"Food," Arthur agreed, pushing himself off the couch. "I'll help."

They ended up making toast and scrambled eggs and eating on the couch in the living room, flipping through channels on the TV.

"That was good," Arthur said when he was finished. He set his plate down on the coffee table. "I make excellent toast. The eggs were fine, too, I guess."

"Thanks," Merlin said around a mouthful of food. "Can I get a reference from you? I'm opening up my own egg restaurant."

"Bit of a leap from fantasy editor to egg restauranteur, but sure. Anything to help a local small business."

Merlin grinned and finished off his breakfast before stacking his plate on top of Arthur's. "What are you up to for the rest of the weekend?" he asked.

"Nothing," Arthur said around a yawn. "My dad's going to be at the hospital for the most part. I might see if Gwaine or Leon stuck around and, I don't know, go to the movies or something."

"Is there anything good out?"

Arthur shrugged and pulled out his cell phone to check what was playing.

"Can I get your number, by the way?" he asked quietly, scrolling though showtimes. "I was thinking we should hang out once I move to the city next month. If you want."

"Yeah," Merlin agreed, feeling warm. "That'd be nice."

Merlin gave his number and then read plot synopses over Arthur's shoulder until they decided they'd rather not see a movie. Arthur texted some of his old teammates, Merlin texted Gwen, and within a few minutes they had plans to meet everyone who was still in town back at the park.

"Thanks again for letting me crash here," Arthur said as he pulled on and laced up his shoes. "Tell your mom thanks, too."

"Sure. It's no problem at all."

Merlin opened the front door, and Arthur took a step into it before pausing and turning back to Merlin.

They were standing far too close, and Merlin tried not to notice, but he could see each of Arthur's eyelashes. And he could feel his heart in his throat.

"I had a good time last night," Arthur said quietly. "I'm glad we got to talk."

Merlin nodded and forced himself to smile. "Yeah. Me too."

Arthur grinned and finished walking through the door, and Merlin followed close behind.

 

\----------

 

When Merlin finally got home to his own apartment after a long weekend spent in his hometown, he went straight for the shower. He rinsed off, and then off again, and then he stood under the stream until the hot water was dead for probably the entire building.

Despite his efforts, he couldn't wash away the tingling feeling he still had from the way Arthur had looked at him all weekend. It hadn't been anything obvious—Gwen definitely would have already texted him about it if it had been—and maybe it hadn't really been anything at all. But Merlin had felt Arthur's eyes on him, had caught Arthur looking away whenever he noticed the staring, had seen Arthur blush the one time he dared to return the gaze.

He didn't know what it all meant.

Except that he wasn't stupid, and he definitely knew what it meant.

It had been nearly a decade since they'd last seen each other, and things hadn't ended on the best of notes, but there was still something there. There was still chemistry, still banter, still affection, still a spark that lit Merlin up in a way he hadn't felt in a long, long time.

But they'd broken up so long ago, and they'd been so young when they were together, and it was silly to think something could be rekindled now just because they were going to be living in the same city soon.

Absolutely silly.

Arthur probably wouldn't even make good on the suggestion that they hang out. They had, as Merlin had pointed out all that time ago, never really been friends. They had no reason to spend time together outside of the reunion weekend. Maybe at most they'd get dinner and realize that, after the initial buzz of see each other again, they had nothing to say to each other.

The spark might still be there, but that didn't have to mean anything would happen. They would just be polite with each other for one dinner. And then they'd go their separate ways again and only come back together another decade later at their 20-year reunion.

And maybe then, if somehow they were both still single, they could have a hot night together where they pretended to be 18 instead of 38 for a few mind-blowing, nostalgic hours. And that would be that.

Maybe.

Or maybe that night would haunt Merlin and he'd spend his middle-age years thinking about what could have been.

Merlin dried himself off and settled on the couch to watch TV for the night, resolving to put the whole thing out of his mind until— _if_ —Arthur reached out.

 

\----------

 

**Did you know there's an all-night cookie store chain here?**

Merlin smirked and turned his chair around, abandoning the book he was supposed to be editing in favor of another aimless text conversation with Arthur.

Arthur had been texting him regularly since the reunion weekend, and he'd finally moved to the city the week before, and Merlin expected it was only a matter of time before they finally met up again.

Until then, though, Arthur seemed content to text Merlin every time he found out something exciting about his new home.

**_Of course I did. Welcome to the urban lifestyle. You've been missing out_ **

**Apparently! These chocolate chips are melting all over me and I'm in heaven**

Merlin glanced at the time. It was nearly 4. He was quickly losing his motivation to sit at his desk for another hour, reading a problematically boring passage about the history of some made-up ancient king.

**_Are you there now? Which location are you at?_ **

Arthur sent him the address, and Merlin went hot all over with the sudden knowledge that Arthur was a mere two blocks away.

**_Can I join you? I'm done with work_ **

**Of course. I'll treat you to a cookie. They have happy hour!**

Merlin grinned and hurried to pack up his things. He ducked past his boss's office and made his way to the cookie shop as quickly—and _calmly_ —as he could.

Arthur was waiting outside and immediately pulled him in for a hug.

"Hey!" he said, patting Merlin on the back. "It's good to see you."

"You too," Merlin said, not bothering to rein in his smile.

"Cookie?"

Merlin nodded and let Arthur treat him to a chocolate chip cookie.

"I can't believe this place is within walking distance of my apartment," Arthur said as they set up camp in the window seat. "They do delivery. I’m doomed."

Merlin laughed. "Yeah, sometimes I come here on my lunch break. It's a problem."

"Where's your office?"

Merlin pointed out the window. "Two blocks that way. Where'd you move again?"

Arthur pointed in the opposite direction. "About four blocks that-a-way. Want to come see?"

"Really?" Merlin asked, his pulse picking up at the idea of being alone with Arthur in his apartment.

"Sure. It's still kind of a mess, I haven't finished unpacking or anything. But…" Arthur trailed off, looking uncertain.

"Sure," Merlin agreed quickly. "I mean, yeah. I don't mind a mess."

Arthur grinned. "Okay. Great."

He stood and held out his hands to help Merlin up, which left them standing far too close.

"Um," Merlin said, taking a step to the side. "So, like, how come your not at work?" he asked, desperate to brush past the moment.

"Playing hooky," Arthur said as he led the way out of the store and toward his apartment. "I felt like exploring. I went in this morning for a meeting, but I didn't have anything else going on for the rest of the day, so…"

"What else did you explore? Besides cookies."

"Mostly cookies. I went to a couple of stores. Nothing that exciting, actually. Except the cookies."

"The cookies are very exciting," Merlin teased. "I can show you around one weekend, if you want."

"Yeah," Arthur said softly. "That'd be great."

Merlin cleared his throat and started walking a little quicker. He didn't know what the hell he was doing. He and Arthur kept swinging between flirtation and awkwardness, and it was much more difficult to deal with in person than it had been over text message.

"This is me," Arthur said after they'd walked in silence for a bit. He unlocked the front door of the building and led Merlin up two flights of stairs before coming to a stop. "I did warn you it was messy," he said, offering an apologetic smile as he unlocked the apartment.

Merlin stepped inside and smirked. There were half-unpacked boxes in every corner, miscellaneous items piled up two feet high on one end of the couch, books stacked haphazardly on the bookshelves, and clothes and towels strewn over the dining room table.

"When did you move in?" Merlin teased.

"Six days ago," Arthur muttered. "I'll get it fixed up eventually."

"It's very you," Merlin teased. "Remember that one time your dad nearly caught us because he wanted to come lecture you about the mess in your room?"

Arthur snorted. "Now I do. He was right, though."

"Maybe. You were a bit busy to clean up, though."

Arthur blinked, and Merlin flushed.

"Busy with—"

"Me," Merlin said quietly. "Bad joke, sorry."

"No, it was…" Arthur took a deep breath, and Merlin froze. "Actually, I was, um. I was wondering if, maybe, like—"

"Arthur," Merlin stopped him. "You can skip the speech."

Arthur frowned and deflated somewhat. "Oh. Sorry, I—"

"No, I mean, just…" Merlin took a step forward, into Arthur's personal space. "Can I kiss you?"

"Oh," Arthur breathed. "Yeah."

The moment felt too heavy for them to rush into it, though, so Merlin took the time to lick his lips and step a bit closer before tilting his head. Arthur inhaled sharply, and Merlin felt all the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.

The energy between them was hot and wild, and Merlin couldn't stand it anymore. He closed his eyes and moved in. Arthur met him halfway, and the kiss lingered for a moment before Arthur got his hands on Merlin's waist and everything got closer.

"Christ," Arthur breathed when Merlin pulled back just enough to leave them room to speak. "Wow."

"Yeah," Merlin agreed, his eyes still closed. He was dizzy with want and memories and need and questions, but all he wanted was _more_. More of Arthur, more of the kissing, more of the strong hands on his side, more of the scent that was making his mind go haywire with flashes of half-forgotten trysts back in Arthur's old room, more of everything.

He forced himself to take a breath and a step back, knowing they couldn't just jump into this like they had after the first time they'd kissed so long ago.

"Were you planning this?" Merlin asked.

Arthur shook his head. "No. I wanted it, but I thought… I wasn't sure if you would. I tried to wait, I was going to, like, properly woo you, but…" He untucked Merlin's shirt to get his hands on Merlin's skin. "You make it hard to wait. I was trying to, but you kept leaning into it."

"You make it hard to wait, too."

Arthur smiled and pressed a soft kiss to Merlin's lips. "I've been waiting since the second I saw you at the reunion."

"Really?"

"Yeah. You looked incredible. I mean, you still do."

Merlin grinned and went in for another, longer kiss.

"Wait," he said, pulling back again. "Did you say you wanted to 'woo' me?"

Arthur blushed. "Yeah. I don't know. 'Court' seemed too old-fashioned."

"You're an idiot," Merlin said fondly.

"I know."

"At least there's that." Merlin brushed a hand over Arthur's hair. "So if… I mean, courting and wooing are pretty… pretty serious words. Do you want, like… a relationship?"

"Yeah," Arthur said quietly. "I mean, eventually. We don't have to jump right to that. I'd like to, you know, take you out for dinner or something first."

Merlin smirked. "Yeah. Dinner would be nice."

"Good. But… yeah. I'm… I'm in this, if you are. If you just want to hook up, then…" Arthur trailed off, frowning.

"I don't," Merlin assured him. "I mean, I _do_ , actually. But then dinner. And then we can go from there, I guess."

Arthur grinned and moved his hands to Merlin's neck before pulling him in for a kiss. "Good. Let's do that, then."

Merlin nodded, wrapping his arms around Arthur's back and leaning back in. They kissed slowly at first, keeping it gentle and testing out if they still liked the same things from years back. Then Arthur tugged a little on Merlin's hair, pulling him closer, and Merlin let out a moan. That spurred Arthur on, and pretty soon there was no space between them as they held each other, getting greedy and messy, getting hands in hair and friction against thighs and tongues in ears.

Arthur leaned back enough to pull off Merlin's shirt, and Merlin tried to catch his breath.

"Fuck, you look good," Arthur breathed, tracing a line of muscle down Merlin's front. He leaned in to kiss along Merlin's chest, and Merlin sighed, feeling weak.

Arthur was _all over_ him, and Merlin was having a hard time holding back. He'd been thinking about this for weeks, and it was all he could do to stop himself from shoving Arthur onto the clean corner of the couch to suck him senseless.

"Merlin," Arthur muttered, his lips against Merlin's neck. "What do you want to do?"

Merlin shuddered at the question and dug his fingers into Arthur's sides. "Whatever," he whispered, "whatever you want. Please."

Arthur groaned and sucked on Merlin's neck for a moment before dropping to his knees and working to undo Merlin's belt. Merlin hurried to help, and before he could prepare himself, Arthur was placing a kiss to the tip of his cock.

"Fuck, Arthur," Merlin breathed, widening his stance and trying to steady himself. This was happening so fast, he still wasn't entirely sure he wasn't dreaming. Arthur was like a dream, all blond and hot and looking at Merlin's dick like it was a buffet.

"God, you smell good," Arthur said before getting his lips around the head of Merlin's cock.

He went slowly, taking it in inch by inch until Merlin could barely breathe and until he finally had Merlin's whole dick in his mouth.

Arthur had always been good at this, even when he was brand new to it, and years of practice had only made him better. He sucked Merlin's cock like he owned the damn thing and it was his to do with as he pleased, and all Merlin could do was hold onto his hair and breathe through it.

When Arthur took a break to suck on Merlin's balls, Merlin took the opportunity to shift until he could lean against the kitchen counter, no longer trusting his legs to keep him upright.

Arthur said something, his voice muffled against Merlin's skin since he seemed unwilling to properly pull back to speak.

"What?" Merlin asked, tugging on Arthur's hair a little.

Arthur looked up, locked eyes with Merlin, and flicked out his tongue to tease the tip of Merlin's cock. Merlin swallowed heavily and tugged on his hair again.

"I said I want you to fuck me after dinner."

"Christ," Merlin moaned and guided his dick back into Arthur's eager mouth. Arthur groaned around it, and Merlin could feel the orgasm building low in his gut. "Arthur," he warned, slackening his grip on Arthur's hair and trying to control himself.

Arthur hummed encouragement and started getting sloppy with it, making filthy noises. Merlin whimpered and moved his hands to his own hair, needing to hold onto something still. He dared to glance down and saw that Arthur had a hand shoved down his own jeans.

"Don't come," Merlin warned. Then that thought fully hit him and he groaned, feeling himself starting to come. "Fuck, Arthur—"

Arthur sucked him through it and through it and through it, proving that some things never changed. Merlin had to push him away when it got to be too much. He held Arthur's head at bay, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath.

"Jesus Christ," he sighed. He wasn't sure his legs were going to be able to hold him up much longer.

"Good?" Arthur asked.

Merlin snorted. "Like you really have to ask."

Arthur smirked and stood for a kiss.

"Get on the couch," Merlin whispered, pushing Arthur's jeans down.

Arthur stepped out of them, and his briefs, and Merlin pushed him down on the couch and stripped his shirt off as well.

He was surprised, at first, to see the tattoo on Arthur's shoulder, but then he remembered their conversation at the reunion and wondered how he could have forgotten. He ran his fingers over it, tracing the branches and flowers of the vines covering most of Arthur's upper arm.

"You like?" Arthur asked.

Merlin nodded and pressed a kiss to the tattoo before shifting down.

"I'm not—oh, fuck," Arthur gasped as Merlin sank his mouth down around his cock without any preamble. "Fuck, Merlin, I'm so close."

Merlin groaned and pulled back to suck on the head of Arthur's dick, flicking his tongue against the tip. He loved the idea of Arthur wanting this as badly as he had, of Arthur jerking himself off while going down on Merlin, of Arthur desperately trying to hold himself back from coming too soon.

"Not yet," Merlin said when Arthur's hips lifted off the couch. He pressed down on Arthur's thigh with one hand and tugged on Arthur's balls with the others, making Arthur gasp.

"Merlin—"

"Not yet," Merlin repeated before ducking back down to lick up Arthur's cock. Arthur spread his legs wider, groaning.

Merlin pressed two fingers into the skin below Arthur's balls, rubbing his perineum, and Arthur exhaled shakily. Everything Arthur was doing was going straight to Merlin's dick, and he was already getting hard again. He had missed this, had been fantasizing about this, had been _wanting_ this. Wanting Arthur. Arthur was eager and hot and delicious. He smelled good, he tasted good, he looked good, he felt good—every little thing about him was just another thing making Merlin want him even more.

"Merlin," Arthur breathed a minute later.

"Mhm," Merlin said around Arthur's dick. He went back to flicking his tongue against the tip, and Arthur came after just a moment, groaning low and deep with his hands tangled uselessly in Merlin's hair.

"Merlin," Arthur said again, a bit of an edge to his voice.

Merlin took the hint and pulled off his cock with a slurp. Arthur wrinkled his nose at the sound, and Merlin laughed.

"You're gross," Arthur said without any heat.

"Sorry, should I go?"

Arthur smirked and tugged at Merlin's hands until Merlin got up and sat on his thighs, straddling his waist.

"It feels weird to say that I've missed you," Arthur said, wrapping his arms around Merlin's back. "But…"

"Yeah," Merlin agreed. "Me too."

Arthur moved in for a kiss and, after a few seconds, reached between them to pull on Merlin's cock.

"Not 18 anymore," Merlin whispered.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that's not going to be a short handjob."

"Like I care."

Merlin grinned and licked into Arthur's mouth, letting him have his way. Arthur worked him over slowly, sometimes reaching between his legs to tease his hole, until Merlin was trembling in his lap. Then he wrapped his hand around both of their cocks and jerked them off together.

"Arthur," Merlin breathed, his whole body shaking with how close he was. "Please, please—"

"Please what?" Arthur asked, taking a guess and moving his hand faster.

"Please come," Merlin said on a sob. He needed Arthur to get there first. He needed to see it. He needed to watch Arthur's face twisted in pleasure.

Arthur smirked and let go of Merlin's cock to focus on himself. Merlin scooted back to give him room, but it didn't take longer than a minute for Arthur to bring himself off. He tossed his head back with a grunt, twisting his hand over his cock and biting his lip.

Merlin watched, his own cock straining at the sight, until Arthur lifted his head and reached for Merlin again. Merlin came before Arthur even got a proper grip on him, and he leaned down for a rough kiss as it ripped through him.

"Jesus, Merlin," Arthur said when Merlin slumped into him.

Merlin murmured his agreement, tucking his head against Arthur's neck.

Arthur wrapped his arms around Merlin's back again and they sat that way for a while until their breathing evened out and they realized how sticky they were.

"Do you want a shower?" Arthur murmured. "Before dinner?"

"Yeah," Merlin agreed without lifting his head.

"Okay."

"Okay."

Arthur chuckled and gave Merlin's bum a light slap. "Come on," he said. "The sooner we shower the sooner we can eat, and the sooner we eat the sooner you can fuck me."

Merlin groaned and sat up a little, giving Arthur a kiss. "You're impossible."

"I'm fucking delightful and you know it."

Merlin sniggered and moved in for another kiss. "We'll see."

"What does that mean?"

"Dunno. Guess we'll find out."

"What…"

Merlin laughed and got to his feet, holding out his hands to pull Arthur up as well.

"Thanks," Arthur said, running his hands through Merlin's hair.

"For what?"

"Dunno. For being you, I guess. For wanting this."

"I don't see how anyone couldn't want this," Merlin said quietly.

"Me neither." Arthur gave Merlin a soft kiss and then pinched his butt. "Shower?"

"Shower," Merlin agreed.

He followed Arthur into the shower where they rinsed off the come and the sweat and then made out under the stream.

"What do you want for dinner?" Arthur asked eventually, pushing his wet hair out of his eyes.

"You."

Arthur smirked and nipped at Merlin's lower lip. "You're ridiculous."

"You're Arthur."

Arthur doubled over with laughter. "Wow, Merlin. You're a genius."

"I know."

Arthur snorted and turned off the water. "Come on," he said, pulling Merlin out of the shower. "What do you _really_ want for dinner?"

"I'm not picky," Merlin said. "Is there anywhere you've been wanting to go?"

"There's a cute-looking Italian place around the corner. We could try there?"

"Yeah. My treat."

Arthur frowned. "No, it's—"

"It's my treat," Merlin said again. "As a welcome home present. Or whatever."

Arthur smiled softly. "All right. Thank you."

"Sure." Merlin gave him a kiss. "It's my pleasure."

"No, it'll be _my_ pleasure."

"Oh my _God_ , you are impossible."

"You know you love it," Arthur teased.

Merlin bit his lip.

Arthur blushed a deep red. "I mean—sorry. I meant—"

"Hey," Merlin said quietly. He gave Arthur another kiss.

"Hey," Arthur said uncertainly.

"I'm glad we're doing this," Merlin said. "It feels… really right."

Arthur licked his lips. "Yeah. I agree."

"Okay." Merlin gave him one last kiss before stepping away to dry off, glad they had gotten through Arthur's awkward slip up.

"What do you think Gwen's going to say?" Arthur asked as they were getting dressed.

"That she told me so. Lance?"

"Same thing," Arthur said, laughing. "I hate them."

"You don't."

"No, I do. You know they have a bet going, right?"

Merlin paused with his hand on his fly. "What?"

"Yeah. Lance bet Gwen we'd get together within a month."

"And what did Gwen bet?"

"Within a week."

"Well. I'll make her take me out to dinner with her winnings," Merlin said. "That's what she gets for gambling."

Arthur smirked and let Merlin finish zipping up before going in for a kiss. "Ready for dinner?"

"Mhm. You?"

"Yeah." Arthur held out his hand, and Merlin took it.

"After you," Merlin said, giving Arthur's hand a squeeze.

Arthur pressed a kiss to the back of Merlin's hand and then led the way to the restaurant, holding his hand tight.


End file.
